How could you go... right when I needed you.

It's a shame
You see that I'm hurtin'
And you don't know what you did
You probably don't
even care to know
what it is
You promised that you'd be down
That you were my best friend
Was it all for nothin'

How could you go
Right when I needed you
You never showed
The love that I'm
always showin' to you
Now you know that I'm
gonna leave you
You're tellin' me no
Cuz it's gonna hurt you
Feelin' so cold

I wanted to know you
But karma's a trip now
You probably
shouldn't have let me
standin' alone
I wanted to love you
But karma's a trip now
You probably should turn around
And take yourself home

Karma, karma
It's just karma, karma
It's just karma, karma
It's just karma's a trip

You're the flame
I keep runnin' back to
you (back to you)
Feel the pain
I keep runnin' to you
Thinkin' somethin's gon' change
But now that the story is over
I'm turnin' the page
Maybe in history

How could you go
Right when I needed you
You never showed
The love that I'm
always showin' to you
Now you know that I'm
gonna leave you
You're tellin' me no
Cuz it's gonna hurt you
Feelin' so cold

I wanted to know you
But karma's a trip now
You probably
shouldn't have let me
standin' alone
I wanted to love you
But karma's a trip now
You probably should turn around
And take yourself home

Karma, karma
It's just karma, karma
It's just karma, karma
It's just karma's a trip

What goes around comes around
(No, no)
Me and you
Me and you (and you)
The tables have turned around And now
I'm lettin' you go
(No, go)

I wanted to know you
But karma's a trip now
You probably
shouldn't have let me
standin' alone
I wanted to love you
But kamra's a trip now
You probably should turn around
And take yourself home

I wanted to know you
But karma's a trip now
You probably
shouldn't have let me
standin' alone
I wanted to love you
But kamra's a trip now
You probably should turn around
And take yourself home

Karma, karma
It's just karma, karma
It's just karma, karma
It's just karma's a trip

I was pretty bummed out today. Didn't really talk to anyone. Didn't really do anything. Didn't feel like saying or doing anything. I guess, two hours of crying and three hours of sleep does that to you. And throughout the day, the thought of breaking up plagued my mind and left me restless. And so I needed to get my mind off of him. So I went to browse around. Then I came to the book stall and then browsed through the books. And I left with two novels and a movie for Nanette. I started reading and surprisingly, it did work. My mind was occupied and if I were to absorb myself into the book, then the sinking-heart feeling and the tight, fireball throat feeling would ease. And at some point. I made a decision.

I will wait till 12:00 A.M. for him to call. If he doesn't, then from then on, I will not pick up his calls. In fact, I won't talk to him until he shows up in front of my house. And if he doesn't do that by Thursday, our five months anniversary, then I'll know what to do. It simply means he doesn't care. And it simply means that he's not worth it. And then, I'll break it off. This is his last chance. Last chance to show me that he's not like the rest of them. Heck, I was stupid and naive to think that he was different. But I'm still clinging to that hope for him to prove me wrong.

Either way, if it does end, I'll have two novels to keep me from resorting to the pathetic girl that cries and gives up on everything. Yeah, I'm prepared this time if it happens. At least, I hope I am. I wonder if he'll call.

BTW, I'm on page 180 now. =]